Change

Writing in this blog is a little like that homeless guy having a conversation with the crosswalk button at Grove and Market because he thinks it's an alien that speaks in hushed machine-gun-like bursts. Speaking of homeless people, am I doing a disservice to the needy when I base my change-giving decisions on how nice I think the person is? For example, there is a really unimposing dude who hangs out by the Mel's on Van Ness and Geary, and I gave him a dollar yesterday and have probably given him several dollars overall throughout my tenure here downtown. He's always really grateful and in a great mood. But yesterday after I gave him my dollar, there was a guy in one of the alleys who resembled what I imagine would be the human manifestation of a San Francisco pigeon. In a classical sense of the word, surely the pigeon man would be more in need of "help." But the other cat seemed like he just wanted to get a burger. There is also the lady who simply sits outside of the Naan N Curry looking like a long-lost relative of Mark Borchardt and kind of snorts, "Spare a quarter?" She never gets change either because she is abrasive and there is something slightly ominous about the way she sets up camp between the tree and the newspaper dispensers. It smacks of a trap. Anyway, this all seems unjust to me, but in this wintery economic climate I have to be selective with my change. I sometimes imagine that some beautiful woman will see me giving someone my spare money and think to herself, "Now, there is a young man who could afford to buy me a multiple-course dinner." So far though, nothing. Perhaps they are all not hungry.